[Major Payne]

World's Shortest Fairy Tale

Once upon a time, a guy asked a girl "Will you marry me?" The girl said "No."

And the guy lived happily ever after and went fishing a lot.

THE END

Ron

[Advertisements]

Why do men's hearts beat quicker, go weak in the knees, get dry throats and think irrationally when a woman wears leather clothing?


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BECAUSE SHE SMELLS LIKE the INTERIOR OF A NEW DODGE TRUCK...!


Ron

[Major Payne]

Why do men's hearts beat quicker, go weak in the knees, get dry throats and think irrationally when a woman wears leather clothing?


*
*
*
*
*
*
*
BECAUSE SHE SMELLS LIKE the INTERIOR OF A NEW DODGE TRUCK...!


Ron

[Major Payne]

TOP TEN Ways To Maintain A Healthy Level of Insanity (OK, maybe not all 10 will be listed):

1. At Lunch Time, sit in your parked car with sunglasses on and point a hair dryer at passing cars. See if they slow down.

Ron

[Major Payne]

2. Page yourself over the intercom. Don't disguise your voice.

Ron

[Major Payne]

3. Every time someone asks you to do something, ask if they want fries with that.

Ron

[Troy]

just in case this thread needs it.... BUMP

[Major Payne]

4. Put your garbage can on your desk and label it "In".

Ron

[Troy]

You know Major Payne, you've put more posts into this one thread than I have in total

[Major Payne]

5. Put Decaf in the coffee maker for three weeks. Once everyone has gotten over their caffeine addictions, switch to Espresso.


Ron

[Major Payne]

6. In the Memo Field of all your checks, write "For Sexual Favors"

Ron

[Major Payne]

7. Finish all your sentences with "In accordance with the Prophecy."

Ron

[Major Payne]

8. Specify that your drive-through order is "To Go."

Ron

[Major Payne]

9. Go to a Poetry Recital and ask why the poems don't rhyme.

Ron

[Major Payne]

Couldn't resist all 10:


10. When the money comes out of the ATM, scream "I won!, I won!"

Ron

[Troy]

10. When the money comes out of the ATM, scream "I won!, I won!"

I was in a pub once, when I was next in line at the ATM. A bit later on, the guy who was in front of me was trying to convince his mates he'd just won $80 out of the pokies, and I'd just seen him withdraw it...