[BHowett]

HA HA I get a kick out of reading Chuck Norris facts….. I just thought I would share, feel free to add any other of the clean jokes.


Chuck Norris' tears cure cancer. Too bad he has never cried.

Chuck Norris counted to infinity - twice.

Chuck Norris does not hunt because the word hunting infers the probability of failure. Chuck Norris goes killing.

If you can see Chuck Norris, he can see you. If you can't see Chuck Norris you may be only seconds away from death.

When the Boogeyman goes to sleep every night he checks his closet for Chuck Norris.

Chuck Norris has already been to Mars; that's why there are no signs of life there.

A blind man once stepped on Chuck Norris' shoe. Chuck replied, "Don't you know who I am? I'm Chuck Norris!" The mere mention of his name cured this man blindness. Sadly the first, last, and only thing this man ever saw, was a fatal roundhouse delivered by Chuck Norris.

Chuck Norris is currently suing NBC, claiming Law and Order are trademarked names for his left and right legs.

When Chuck Norris had surgery, the anesthesia was applied to the doctors.

Chuck Norris ordered a Big Mac at Burger King, and got one.

Chuck Norris’ roundhouse kick is so powerful, it can be seen from outer space by the naked eye.

The grass is always greener on the other side, unless Chuck Norris has been there. In that case the grass is most likely soaked in blood and tears.



http://www.thechucknorrisfacts.com/

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we all have superman pyjamas, superman has chuck norris pyjamas

Edited by geekwithoutgrounds, 06 March 2010 - 01:16 PM.

[geekwithoutgrounds]

we all have superman pyjamas, superman has chuck norris pyjamas

Edited by geekwithoutgrounds, 06 March 2010 - 01:16 PM.

[BHowett]

nice one

[FNP]

Chuck Norris doesn't read books- he just stares at them until her gets the information he wants.

There are no ugly people- just people that have met Chuck Norris.

Chuck Norris CAN believe it's not butter.

Chuck Norris divided by zero.

Chuck Norris once made a deal with the devil. He traded his soul, and in exchange was given his rugged good looks and marshal arts abilities. Norris than proceeded to roundhouse kick the devil in the face and reclaim his soul. The devil, impressed by the irony of the situation, laughed at the situation and allowed Norris to go. The two now play poker on Tuesday nights.

[BHowett]

I'm wearing a Chuck Norris tee-shirt right now that reads "If you can see Chuck Norris, he can see you. If you can't see Chuck Norris you may be only seconds away from death." and it has a picture of him from the Missing In Action movies.

[geekwithoutgrounds]

i like the 5th one from FearNothingProductions

[sharlpero]

Once Chuck Norris met King Leonidas ))



Versus animation series

[FNP]

Maybe not entirely appropriate, but still funny.

[Thunderbird1988]

Chuck Norris can delete the Recycling Bin.

Chuck Norris runs Windows Vista on his Etch-a-Sketch.

[FNP]

Most people know that Descartes said, "I think, therefore I am."

What most people don't realize is that Descartes went on to say, "... afraid of Chuck Norris."

[crooz]

Chuck Norris forced me to buy Total Gym, or else!

[Matthew C. Miller]

The Soviet Union fell immediately following the first screening of Walker, Texas Ranger inside the country.

Plato said: Courage is knowing what not to fear, which never includes Chuck Norris.

My all time favorite, though, is: Chuck Norris has two speeds, walk and kill.

This is the best thread I've read in weeks. Thank you all. Now I have to go and reattach my caboose.

[FNP]

Now I have to go and reattach my caboose.

Not sure I want to know that that means...

[Matthew C. Miller]

It's polite language referring to the acronym ROTFLMFAO, if that clears it up at all. Just trying my best to keep things clean!

[FNP]

Gotcha

Never know with these geeks around here...