Jump to content

Welcome to Geeks to Go - Register now for FREE

Geeks To Go is a helpful hub, where thousands of volunteer geeks quickly serve friendly answers and support. Check out the forums and get free advice from the experts. Register now to gain access to all of our features, it's FREE and only takes one minute. Once registered and logged in, you will be able to create topics, post replies to existing threads, give reputation to your fellow members, get your own private messenger, post status updates, manage your profile and so much more.

Create Account How it Works
Photo

Chuck Norris facts


  • Please log in to reply

#1
BHowett

BHowett

    OT Moderator

  • Moderator
  • 4,648 posts
HA HA I get a kick out of reading Chuck Norris facts….. I just thought I would share, feel free to add any other of the clean jokes.


Chuck Norris' tears cure cancer. Too bad he has never cried.

Chuck Norris counted to infinity - twice.

Chuck Norris does not hunt because the word hunting infers the probability of failure. Chuck Norris goes killing.

If you can see Chuck Norris, he can see you. If you can't see Chuck Norris you may be only seconds away from death.

When the Boogeyman goes to sleep every night he checks his closet for Chuck Norris.

Chuck Norris has already been to Mars; that's why there are no signs of life there.

A blind man once stepped on Chuck Norris' shoe. Chuck replied, "Don't you know who I am? I'm Chuck Norris!" The mere mention of his name cured this man blindness. Sadly the first, last, and only thing this man ever saw, was a fatal roundhouse delivered by Chuck Norris.

Chuck Norris is currently suing NBC, claiming Law and Order are trademarked names for his left and right legs.

When Chuck Norris had surgery, the anesthesia was applied to the doctors.

Chuck Norris ordered a Big Mac at Burger King, and got one.

Chuck Norris’ roundhouse kick is so powerful, it can be seen from outer space by the naked eye.

The grass is always greener on the other side, unless Chuck Norris has been there. In that case the grass is most likely soaked in blood and tears.



http://www.thechucknorrisfacts.com/

:)
  • 0

Advertisements


#2
geekwithoutgrounds

geekwithoutgrounds

    Member

  • Member
  • PipPip
  • 57 posts
we all have superman pyjamas, superman has chuck norris pyjamas :)

Edited by geekwithoutgrounds, 06 March 2010 - 01:16 PM.

  • 0

#3
BHowett

BHowett

    OT Moderator

  • Topic Starter
  • Moderator
  • 4,648 posts
nice one :)
  • 0

#4
FNP

FNP

    Member

  • Member
  • PipPipPip
  • 606 posts
Chuck Norris doesn't read books- he just stares at them until her gets the information he wants.

There are no ugly people- just people that have met Chuck Norris.

Chuck Norris CAN believe it's not butter.

Chuck Norris divided by zero.

Chuck Norris once made a deal with the devil. He traded his soul, and in exchange was given his rugged good looks and marshal arts abilities. Norris than proceeded to roundhouse kick the devil in the face and reclaim his soul. The devil, impressed by the irony of the situation, laughed at the situation and allowed Norris to go. The two now play poker on Tuesday nights.
  • 0

#5
BHowett

BHowett

    OT Moderator

  • Topic Starter
  • Moderator
  • 4,648 posts
:) I'm wearing a Chuck Norris tee-shirt right now that reads "If you can see Chuck Norris, he can see you. If you can't see Chuck Norris you may be only seconds away from death." and it has a picture of him from the Missing In Action movies.
  • 0

#6
geekwithoutgrounds

geekwithoutgrounds

    Member

  • Member
  • PipPip
  • 57 posts
i like the 5th one from FearNothingProductions :)
  • 0

#7
sharlpero

sharlpero

    Member

  • Member
  • PipPipPip
  • 136 posts
Once Chuck Norris met King Leonidas ))



Versus animation series
  • 0

#8
FNP

FNP

    Member

  • Member
  • PipPipPip
  • 606 posts
:)

Maybe not entirely appropriate, but still funny.
  • 0

#9
Thunderbird1988

Thunderbird1988

    Member 2k

  • Member
  • PipPipPipPipPip
  • 2,416 posts
Chuck Norris can delete the Recycling Bin.

Chuck Norris runs Windows Vista on his Etch-a-Sketch.
  • 0

#10
FNP

FNP

    Member

  • Member
  • PipPipPip
  • 606 posts
Most people know that Descartes said, "I think, therefore I am."

What most people don't realize is that Descartes went on to say, "... afraid of Chuck Norris."
  • 0

Advertisements


#11
crooz

crooz

    Member

  • Member
  • PipPipPip
  • 412 posts
Chuck Norris forced me to buy Total Gym, or else! scared0003.gif
  • 0

#12
Matthew C. Miller

Matthew C. Miller

    Member

  • Member
  • PipPipPip
  • 116 posts
The Soviet Union fell immediately following the first screening of Walker, Texas Ranger inside the country.

Plato said: Courage is knowing what not to fear, which never includes Chuck Norris.

My all time favorite, though, is: Chuck Norris has two speeds, walk and kill.

:) This is the best thread I've read in weeks. Thank you all. Now I have to go and reattach my caboose.
  • 0

#13
FNP

FNP

    Member

  • Member
  • PipPipPip
  • 606 posts

Now I have to go and reattach my caboose.


Not sure I want to know that that means... :)
  • 0

#14
Matthew C. Miller

Matthew C. Miller

    Member

  • Member
  • PipPipPip
  • 116 posts
It's polite language referring to the acronym ROTFLMFAO, if that clears it up at all. Just trying my best to keep things clean!
  • 0

#15
FNP

FNP

    Member

  • Member
  • PipPipPip
  • 606 posts
Gotcha :)

Never know with these geeks around here... :)
  • 1






Similar Topics

0 user(s) are reading this topic

0 members, 0 guests, 0 anonymous users

As Featured On:

Microsoft Yahoo BBC MSN PC Magazine Washington Post HP