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Quotable Quotes


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#1
Dragon

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ok, just thought I would give this a try.

How about everyone add a quotable quote that you may or may not have heard? If this doesn't sound like fun, so be it, but you might be surprised in what you may learn.

all quotes that you didn't make yourself, must have the authors name in it, as well as the location of where you got it from. for example:

type [quote=location of quote] your posted quote with authors name in it[/quote]


hear is my first addition.

[quote name='http://www.brainyquote.com']Computers make it easier to do a lot of things, but most of the things they make it easier to do don't need to be done.
Andy Rooney[/quote]

Lets see what you all can come up with, :tazz:
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#2
Excal

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No Quote thread would be complete with out a few gems from the Great Yogi Berra

(http://rinkworks.com...yogiberra.shtml)

  • "You should always go to other people's funerals; otherwise, they won't come to yours."

  • "I always thought that record would stand until it was broken."
  • "I made a wrong mistake."
  • "Nobody goes there anymore; it's too crowded."
  • "Baseball is 90% mental -- the other half is physical."
  • "You better cut the pizza in four pieces because I'm not hungry enough to eat six."
  • "This is like deja vu all over again."


Edited by Excal, 01 September 2005 - 09:27 AM.

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#3
Excal

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John F. Kennedy
(Didn't get it from a source)

"Ask not what your country can do for you; ask what you can do for your country."


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#4
fleamailman

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Fleamailman: Everyday is a gift.
(meaning each day is a gift)

Fleamailman: sometimes the gods must envy us our mortality.

Fleamailman:(same idea) a flower is beautiful for its brevity.


Sorry I could not spell the quoats of the people that came to mind but I will do next time.
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#5
thenotch

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"The only thing necessary for the triumph of evil is for good men to do nothing." -- Edmund Burke

"Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.
Love never fails. But where there are prophecies, they will cease; where there are tongues, they will be stilled; where there is knowledge, it will pass away.
For we know in part and we prophesy in part, but when perfection comes, the imperfect disappears.
When I was a child, I talked like a child, I thought like a child, I reasoned like a child. When I became a man, I put childish ways behind me.
Now we see but a poor reflection as in a mirror; then we shall see face to face. Now I know in part; then I shall know fully, even as I am fully known.
And now these three remain: faith, hope and love. But the greatest of these is love." -- The Apostle Paul (I Corinthians 13:4-13 [NIV])

"Only two things are infinite, the universe and human stupidity, and I'm not sure about the former." -- Albert Einstein
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#6
Dark_Star_Qc

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"I can only help one person per day. Today is not your day. Tomorrow isn't looking good either" - Samm

:tazz:
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#7
darth_ash

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Geek Version:

"#define QUESTION ((bb) || !(bb))"    — Shakespeare


Translation:

"To be, or not to be: that is the question"    — Shakespeare


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#8
dsenette

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http://www.gdargaud.net/Humor/QuotesComputer.html[/url]']Computer /nm./: a device designed to speed and automate errors."

"SUPERCOMPUTER: what it sounded like before you bought it."

"A computer is like an Old Testament god, with a lot of rules and no mercy."    — Joseph Campbell

"If it wasn't backed-up, then it wasn't important."    — The sysadmin's moto.

"Real men don't use backups, they post their stuff on a public ftp server and let the rest of the world make copies."    — Linus T.

"RAM /abr./: Rarely Adequate Memory."

"The only thing more dangerous than a hardware guy with a code patch is a programmer with a soldering iron."

"The computer allows you to make mistakes faster than any other invention, with the possible exception of handguns and tequila."    — Mitch Ratcliffe.

"A printer consists of three main parts: the case, the jammed paper tray and the blinking red light"

"Pentiums melt in your PC, not in your hand"

"Anti-glare screens to prevent eye strain ??? In my day, you didn't need an anti-glare screen. With the power they consumed, when you turned your computer on, the whole building darkened  !"    — Simon Travaglia (the B.O.F.H.).
"DOS computers manufactured by companies such as IBM, Compaq, Tandy, and millions of others are by far the most popular, with about 70 million machines in use worldwide. Macintosh fans, on the other hand, may note that cockroaches are far more numerous than humans, and that numbers alone do not denote a higher life form."    — New York Times, November 26, 1991.

"The best accelerator available for a Mac is one that causes it to go at 9.81 m/s2."



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#9
dsenette

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[quote name='http://www.gdargaud.net/Humor/QuotesComputer.html#Software']"Counting in binary is just like counting in decimal if you are all thumbs."    — Glaser and Way.

"Two strings walk into a bar. The first string says to the bartender: 'Bartender, I'll have a beer. u.5n$x5t?*&4ru!2[sACC~ErJ'. The second string says: 'Pardon my friend, he isn't NULL terminated'."

"Vampireware /n/, a project, capable of sucking the lifeblood out of anyone unfortunate enough to be assigned to it, which never actually sees the light of day, but nonetheless refuses to die."

"It is easier to change the specification to fit the program than vice versa."

"2 + 2 = 5, for extremely large values of 2."

"ASCII stupid question, get a stupid ANSI !"

"The nice thing about standards is that there are so many to choose from."

"Save a tree — disband an ISO working group today."  — Jason Zions

"Multitasking /adj./ 3 PCs and a chair with wheels !"

"A computer scientist is someone who fixes things that aren't broken."

"Use the source, Luke..."

"The term reboot comes from the middle age (before computers). Horses who stopped in mid-stride required a boot to the rear to start again. Thus the term to rear-boot, later abbreviated into reboot."

"All programmers are optimists. Perhaps this modern sorcery especially attracts those who believe in happy endings and fairy godmothers. Perhaps the hundreds of nitty frustrations drive away all but those who habitually focus on the end goal.
Perhaps it is merely that computers are young, programmers are younger, and the young are always optimists. But however the selection process works, the result is indisputable: 'This time it will surely run' or 'I just found the last bug'."    — Fred Brooks.

"The first 90% of the code accounts for the first 90% of the development time...
...The remaining 10% of the code accounts for the other 90% of the development time."    — Tom Cargill.

"If you want to eat hippopatomus, you've got to pay the freight."    — Attributed to an IBM guy, about why IBM software uses so much memory.

"Programming is an art form that fights back."

"Around computers it is difficult to find the correct unit of time to measure progress. Some cathedrals took a century to complete. Can you imagine the grandeur and scope of a program that would take as long ?"
[/quote]
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#10
meighnot

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I think computer viruses should count as life. Maybe it says something about human nature, that the only form of life we have created so far is purely destructive. Talk about creating life in our own image.


On two occasions, I have been asked [by members of Parliament], 'Pray, Mr. Babbage, if you put into the machine wrong figures, will the right answers come out?' I am not able to rightly apprehend the kind of confusion of ideas that could provoke such a question.


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#11
Kat

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Forgiveness is not an emotion, it's a decision.
--Randall Worley

A true friend reaches for your hand and touches your heart.
~Author Unknown

The greatest mistake you can make in life is to be continually fearing you will make one.
~Elbert Hubbard

Just because you make mistakes doesn't mean you are one.
~Author Unknown




*edited to remove a couple that I just feel don't apply to me anymore.

Edited by ~Kat~, 04 September 2005 - 02:02 AM.

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#12
fleamailman

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Gosh, I have finally found out a way to solve my poor spelling problem in the posts I do, here we go:



RECUEILLEMENT
Sois sage, ô ma Douleur, et tiens-toi plus tranquille.
Tu réclamais le Soir; il descend; le voici:
Une atmosphère obscure enveloppe la ville,
Aux uns portant la paix, aux autres le souci.

Pendant que des mortels la multitude vile,
Sous le fouet du Plaisir, ce bourreau sans merci,
Va cueillir des remords dans la fête servile,
Ma Douleur, donne-moi la main; viens par ici,

Loin d'eux. Vois se pencher les défuntes Années,
Sur les balcons du ciel, en robes surannées;
Surgir du fond des eaux le Regret souriant;

Le Soleil moribond s'endormir sous une arche,
Et, comme un long linceul traînant à l'Orient,
Entends, ma chère, entends la douce Nuit qui marche.


Charles Baudelaire

Actually the French here isn't that difficult but I guess it's the first and last lines which are inspiring.
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#13
Johanna

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Some of my favorites...
Education costs money, but then, so does ignorance.
- Sir Claus Moser

At twenty years of age, the will reigns; at thirty, the wit; and at forty, the judgment. Benjamin Franklin (1706-1790) Statesman

Under certain circumstances, profanity provides a relief denied even to prayer.
Mark Twain

"A human being should be able to change a diaper, plan an invasion, butcher an animal, conn a ship, design a building, write a sonnet, balance accounts, build a wall, set a bone, comfort the dying, take orders, give orders, cooperate, act alone, solve equations, analyze a new problem, pitch manure, program a computer, cook a tasty meal, fight efficiently, die gallantly. Specialization is for insects." -- Robert Heinlin

"The secret of being miserable is to have leisure to bother about whether you are happy or not. The cure for it is occupation."
George Bernard Shaw (1856-1950)

By all means marry. If you get a good wife, you'll become happy; if you get a bad one, you'll become a philosopher.
- Socrates

Dost thou love life? Then do not squander time, for that's the stuff life is made of.
Benjamin Franklin, 'Poor Richard's Almanack,' June 1746

I never drink water because of the disgusting things that fish do in it.
- W.C. Fields

I'm completely in favor of the separation of Church and State. My idea is that these two institutions screw us up enough on their own, so both of them together is certain death.
George Carlin

A fanatic is one who can't change his mind and won't change the subject.
Sir Winston Churchill

I find television very educating. Every time somebody turns on the set, I go into the other room and read a book. - Groucho Marx (1890-1977).

Outside of a dog, a book is man's best friend. Inside of a dog it's too dark to read.
Groucho Marx

One of the advantages of being disorderly is that one is constantly making exciting discoveries.
A. A. Milne

A computer lets you make more mistakes faster than any invention in human history - with the possible exceptions of handguns and tequila.
- Mitch Ratliffe

I find that a great part of the information I have was acquired by looking up something and finding something else on the way.
Franklin P. Adams (1881-1960)

I do not have a psychiatrist and I do not want one, for the simple reason that if he listened to me long enough, he might become disturbed.
James Thurber


Johanna
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#14
HarryMay

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""Kaput what makes you kaput".Found painted in the vault of a german bank after a three day holiday.Also found where 2 bunkbeds,a stove and a refregerator.Seems it took a few weeks tunneling into the vault but no problem as they parked the appropriate vans,cordoned off the section of the sidewalk they were tunneling thru and wore official work uniforms.Got clean away.One more for the boys.
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#15
RockyIV

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D'oh!
Homer Simpsons

I'll be back in a jiffy!
Grandpa Simpsons

If it is hard doing then it is not worth doing!
Homer Simpsons


RockyIV
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