Remember how I said the Wireless switch was on? Well, it was...so I thought. I was like "Well, I'll switch it off and then on again and see what happens" (hadn't done this yet) and when I did, the little slidey thing just fell off! My guess is that somehow it must have broke while I had it in the off position a month or two ago (though I have no idea how). Anyway, I'm gonna get this repaired and hopefully it'll be the end of my woes.
Thank you so so so much for your dedication and determination with helping me and seeing my problem through. You were the most persistent and helpful of all the boards I visited (and I learned a lot), and I'll definitely be using GeekstoGo for any further technical quandries I may find myself in!\
Thanks again ever so much,