So I've posted multiple places and no one has replied to my situation. All the googling in the world hasn't helped and my friends can't figure it out. I'm going to copy pasta my post to steam in hopes that someone here will be able to find a solution. Thank you everyone who helps!
So. My headset works. My headset is happy. The one day I'm playing CS:S and want to rebind my talk key from my middle mouse button. This begins the multi-month struggle to get my mic to work in steam.
At first, I couldn't get my mic to work at all, I had changed a setting or something causing it to stop working. Then I got it to work in everything but steam, with the exception of voice chatting with friends.
I've looked at the steam guides, and weird work-arounds and googled my heart content, and nothing seems to be working.